Coming Back To Life

It’s almost 6 times that I have deleted what I wrote and every time I have thought of something or the other.

Lost in thought and lost in time
While the seeds of life and the seeds of change were planted
Outside the rain fell dark and slow
While I pondered on this dangerous but irresistible pastime
I took a heavenly ride through our silence
I knew the moment had arrived
For killing the past and coming back to life

- Coming Back To Life  by Pink Floyd

Each and every thought has swirled up into my head and caused a near-fatal turmoil. I have been wondering, what is it that I am writing about. Is it my own life or is it about the failures?

Or is it about what I feel right now?

What is life???

For me, it is the twists and turns in which even the bravest and wisest are lost. And when you are lost and you can’t figure out which way to go, nothing comes up. You are lost and lost completely.

This is it, the near end of you.

The very perception of yours, that you are wise, is shattered then & there and you finally gain the true wisdom. Yes, it is not in the success or not in the good times, that you get to know what is the true world around you, rather when your dreams are shattered and life seems miserable; when the friends become foes and you become irrelevant, you know the true meaning of life.

The worst part is not the fact that you facing these adversities, it is the people coming and consoling you and telling you “Everything’s gonna be fine”. Yet backstabbing you behind your back and making you the villain.

But what of you, what happens to you?

Are you hurt? Yes, indeed you are! But What can you do? Can’t you walk, talk or do what you are supposed to?

“Everyone has a hard time, it’s not just u!” does it solve your problem? No! So just f*** the world! Are you going to get anything from that? No. Hell no. Never.

Some great man said.

“Selfless is sacrifice, Selfish is love!”

Indeed it is. You love yourself, then and only then you can think of loving anybody or anything. Success isn’t for the weak and timid. It’s built on the very foundation of failures after failures.

But only that success is cherished which has its relevance because the sweetest thin is not the honey rather it’s the sweat of success.

I have learned one thing from my life, it’s never the end. Never.

And when u ponder on this dangerous irrestible pastime. And you took a heavenly ride through silence. That is when you kill the past and come back to life!

PS: 17th March - 2024: The original text was written by teenage me, which only he can understand. I have tried my best to clean up the spelling, grammar and some continuity, however, it is a very old article written in an era where there were no IMs, and every character had a cost.

The original article can be found here.